The Chit Chat Cafe

WHY??????????

There are some things I have been wondering about...perhaps you have also:

1.  Why, do some people, when given their 15 minutes of fame, for doing or being involved in God knows what......they get invited on The Today Show.......to sit between Meredith and Matt...and they show up wearing old jeans, a dingy tee shirt and a baseball cap?

2.  Why when you have to take a phone message at home, you either can't find a pen.....or the one you do find, doesn't write....I won't even talk about all of the little pieces of odds and end scrap paper we finally write on.

3.  Why on God's green earth do they still make nude color panty hose?  and the bigger why......why do some women wear them with open toe shoes?

4.  When in the car......you always catch the very end of a song you love, but it never fails......you always hear the ones you hate from the beginning?

5.  Why do senior citizens always talk about the medicine they are taking, who died, who is sick, who is buried where......jeez......get some hobbies.....

6.  Why do some people dress up in costume to go to the opening night of certain movies?  (i.e.....Star Wars, Harry Potter, Star Trek, Batman)

7.  Why do some men over 50 insist on buying a Corvette or BMW Z3.....repeat after me.......you look silly driving such a youthful car......not sexy at all.........be elegant and classy...get a sport Jaguar, Sedan Mercedes, Lexus or Infiniti...

8.  Holiday Sweaters?????  (Halloween, Christmas etc) and the accessories that match (christmas ball or pumpkin earrings)....they leave me speechless.

9.  Why do some people camp out for days to be first in line for new tech gadgets coming out?  Were do you pee?  Do you lose your place in line at that point?  If you could wait a couple of months.......the item will be cheaper and you can waltz right into the store....NO CAMPING needed.

10.  Why do some women insist on wearing Birkenstocks?  Can you think of a more UN-COME-F-ME shoe?

11.  Why are the immigration and custom officers in the International arrivals terminal at JFK airport such sour pusses?

12.  Why when you have to return something to a store, you find every receipt but the one you need?

13.  Why do some people insist on carrying on the plane suitcases that are as big as a car to shove into the overhead?  Pay the damn 15.00.

14.  Why am I sitting here on a Saturday morning of a holiday weekend writing on this blog???  Well, first off it is raining...and I am expecting houseguests for the weekend....cousins from Canada.

HAVE A FUN WEEKEND??

Lisa xoxo

Lisas' friend Gina

Hi Everyone, I just wanted to introduce myself ...I'm Gina, Lisa's friend for the past 25 ++++years ..So many funny things have happened to us in the past , that it would take years just to describe  half of it....So many people have mentioned how crazy our lives are and how we should  write down our experiences to make others laugh, so here we are.....Rest assured its funny stuff!!!!!!!!!!!! You will be hearing from me as well, but since some of us work full time (UNLIKE LISA)  I have to go.... Have a Good one!!!!!!!!!!!

The Girls in Uniform

I would like to pay tribute to a fashion staple that I know is a prominent force in mine and my girlfriends closets.....the black pants.....

Yes, we all have our hip jeans.....chic dresses...cool shoes...fab accessories, but nothing.....I repeat nothing is as close to our hearts as the ever faithful pair of black pants/trousers/slacks......

I know I have at least 25 pairs of them...all lined up in my closet like soldiers....and I know in intimate detail what each pair contributes to my life....

I have the ones with a little stretch in them for the days I feel fat......I have the slim ones for the rare days that I feel svelte....my work black pants....my going out black pants....the black pants with the hem falling down....the ones with the ripped lining....

Would you believe I actually get excited when I find a new pair while shopping in Ann Taylor or Banana Republic?  I act like I just found the buried treasure (OK, I know, I need to get a life).....

My girlfriends and I have a standing line we use.....when we are going for a night on the town.....we say....."are you wearing your black pants, or your black pants"?   We call them our uniform.

A couple of DO NOT'S when doning the black beauties......NEVER wear a yellow top.....think Bubble Bee........NEVER wear an orange top.....think Halloween/pumkin.......

I do have a confession to make though....I became a rebel this summer and found gorgeous white pants that make me feel pretty, so I bought 4 pairs....I cheated on my black pants...I haven't worn them since June.......the black pencil skirts and I became lovers over the summer.....

So I salute our uniform......the timeless lovely black pants.

xox

Lisa

How to Start a Very Small Business

A lot of women dream of being their own boss.....my girlfriend Marie and I are two such gals.......

Two years ago, Marie and I started seriously thinking of starting a business.......we would sit around my kitchen table after eating a huge Italian meal (I LOVE TO COOK).....and over key lime pie and cheesecake we would start talking about what type of biz we wanted...we went from baking biscotti....to party planning......to party decorating......finally to jewelry, handbags and gifts.....

Next, telling our husbands........mine said "how much is this little hobby going to cost me"

A little background first.....bear with me...it gets very funny...

Marie and I have been friends since college and the disco/big hair days...she works full time as a child intervention specialist who works 4, twelve hour days......I work part time as an Account Rep for a major luxury Swiss Watch Company....and I have another job as taxi driver to my 3 kids who are involved in a million things...so our plates are very full to begin with........oh boy......

We started meeting every Friday to brain storm...our first order of biz was where are we having lunch?  After sandwiches and of course, dessert, we got down to business....

Then it took us 2 months to come up with a name.......looking back.......some of them were very silly........finally came up with The Trunk Show Boutique.....

Now we had to do the scary stuff......sign up for taxes, figure out if we wanted to incorporate....the boring, mundane details.....I alone went to a consultation with a business expert from Rutgers University......well this dude was more interested in looking at my boobies than talking about sales tax.........

We then opened a business bank account and starting saving money to buy merchandise......

Next on the agenda.......getting into trade shows....since we did get our Tax ID number.......we were able to get into Accessories, The Show at the Javits Center in NYC.....well.....we really aren't Oakie's from Pinoakie's...we are both well traveled and I go to NYC on a dime......but for some reason.....going to our first trade show.......we were acting like we have never been out of the house before........

We parked close to the Javit's Center.......BIG MISTAKE.....50.00 to park........when we walk into the show........we felt like kids at Disneyworld........vendors jumping out at us trying to get our attention to buy their wares.....we felt like the "big shits".....these people were treating us like "buyers".......when in reality we didn't have much more than a pot to piss in......we were getting hungry so we were looking for the vendors that had candy dishes out brimming with chocolates....we would take the candy then had to listen to their spiels.......even if we didn't like their items....

About 2 hours into the show....we decided to check out the free lunch they give you......OK, they don't have enough chairs and tables to eat on and you have to sit on the floor, but hey, it is a very nice spread buffet style.........I get the penne ala vodka......as I was carrying my tray in 3 inch heels......I trip...and guess where my penne ala vodka goes......RIGHT DOWN MY WHITE ANN TAYLOR LINEN PANTS.......yes, I had to walk this glamorous trade show with a huge orangy red stain on my pants.....from thigh to knee..and every freakin person had to comment on it......

That didn't stop us though.....after we bought some beautiful things.......before we paid the 50 bucks to park.....we took a cab to SoHo and ate dinner at a chic bistro (yes, still had the dirty pants on and eating comes before embarrassment)

To some up the rest of our year......we wanted everything with this business to be top notch.......we spent lots of money on cool business cards...jazzy shopping bags.....fancy displays....we had our gala grand opening.....and in one night we almost made our intial investment back.....

It hasn't been all glamour though.....we are a traveling boutique so ........my husband packs up my SUV with all the stuff......then Marie and I have to lug it into our venue..in the rain...in the freezing cold..in heels...with our trusty hand truck....on freight elevators in business loading docks.......

We are having fun though....we laugh a lot......and we always sneak in a lunch or dinner when we have a gig.....we do not mess around when it comes to eating.....we even have a few groupies that follow us from venue to venue, because our merchandise is constantly changing...we only buy one or two of each item.

We are currently having a web site constructed so that we can sell on line......www.thetrunkshowboutique.org  it should be up and running smoothly (I hope) within a week or so....

Lastly........would any of you believe me if I told you that in April when it was time for the CPA to do our taxes.......I walked into this prestigious CPA office with all of our receipts, invoices and such in a big blue and silver Banana Republic box.......now come on, I never said we were organized.

Thought and advice for the day:

Friends don't let friends go home with ugly guys.

Lisa

xo

Confessions!

Before I start getting into all topics fun...I need to confess my sins of this summer......you know...cleanse my conscience...get a fresh start....I did 4 very bad things recently: (I will save the worst for last)

1. Yesterday, while out to lunch with my kids...I ate a piece of Key Lime Pie that was as big as my head......

2.  I lied to my husband....well actually I didn't lie...I just kept the truth from him.....my oldest son, Joe who in 2 weeks will be a senior in high school....had to have his senior pictures taken over the summer....well......God Forbid we just go to the school and get them done at a reasonable fee......NO......We have to go to a professional photographer and have 3 changes of outfits......my son's idea, not mine....he has casual poses, formal poses.......very typical of him......he does look like an Abercrombie and Fitch model.....check the pix out in my album..HOWEVER...these freakin pictures cost what a monthly payment on a brand new 7 series BMW would be....luckily my husband didn't ask what they cost because he would have not been very happy.......luckily, he doesn't look at the checkbook.

3.  Going to Nordstroms semi-annual sale while in Washington DC this summer.......while trying on 275.00 Cole Hahn black patent peep toe, 3 inch heel shoes...I fell flat on my ass while admiring them in the mirror........the cutest 25 year old salesman named Chris came running up to see if I was okay...well he ended up being the biggest doll.....he bought out about 10 pairs of shoes for me to try on...actually put them on my feet for me...buckled them for me......practically gave me a pedicure right in the department...well.....I couldn't very well not buy anything from him........so I bought the 275.00 Cole Hahns (whice WERE NOT ON SALE AND I DID NOT NEED, SINCE I HAVE ABOUT 25 PAIRS OF BLACK HEELS)......two days later....back in NJ.......I RETURNED THEM.  I felt awful......

4.  Now for the doosey......while taking a college tour with my husband and son Joe........due to the nature of my bad behavior the University will remain nameless since it is my son's first choice of places he wants to go and I don't want them to black ball him because of his jack ass mom.....

We took the tour in the middle of a heat wave....92 degrees, humid...sun beating down....it was damn hot....of course I was dressed to the nines...white pants...cute top....3 inche heels (that is a story within it self)....I was sweating horribly...it was dripping down my back....

This is a Catholic university so we toured inside the beautiful church that is on campus...while in there....it was nice to get a break from the heat....BUT.....after the guide was finished talking about the church.....I let all of the 30 people in the group go ahead of me......once everyone was safely out the door and in the sun again......I stayed back in the church....I walked over to the bowl of Holy Water....dipped my entire hand in it and gave myself a sponge bath.....I walked out of the church and Bud (my husband) looked at me looking fresh as a daisy now and said "you didn't do what I think you did, did you?"........I just smiled.  I hope they didn't have a security camera set up in the sanctuary.......

Well I feel better I confessed to my latest sins.

As promised my thought for the day:

"I am not a nag, I am a motivational speaker"

Lisa

Let's Get Aquainted!!!!!

Hi Everyone,

Come in and check out my new blog....

I want to have a forum where girls or guys (straight or gay) can come in and gossip about all things fun.....I am into being blunt. So if you get offended easily or are a prude....leave now!

Want to have lively chats and will enjoy different opinions!

I guess I should introduce myself first.....(I don't want to make my posts long and boring, but this first one might be a little lengthy, just so you know where I am coming from)

I am a 40 something girlie type girl....I have been married to a wonderfully handsome guy, Bud for 21 years (no pot belly on him thank God)...(I got married and had kids young)...speaking of which I have 3 really cool teenagers who kind of have their own lives now, so I have a tad more time for things like this blog.....

Some Facts and topics we will discuss...

1.   I will never be caught dead driving a mini van or wearing " mom" jeans

2.   I would rather have my eyes poked out than go camping

3.   I wash my face with Dial soap, but think nothing of buying 23.00 Chanel Lipsticks

4.   My girlfriends are one of the greatest joys in my life.

5.   Marie, Donna, and Gina....they are 3 of my closet friends...we are all Italian ladies. our grandparents all came over on the boat...you will be hearing from them on this blog.

6.  I love to travel......have traveled a lot....this will be a big topic....I was a Travel Consultant for a lot of years.....talking about annoying people on airplanes will be a post in itself....

7.  I am a retard when it comes to computer literacy .  I can't even program a number in my cell phone.....or God forbid work the DVD player..Also, if there are misspellings on this blog...I can't figure out how to use spell check.

8.  Marie and I have a new business we started a year ago....The Trunk Show Boutique, LLC......getting a website made now.....will post about starting up a business and all of the BS we had to deal with....

9.  Just came into the 21st Century a month ago......finally got a Debit Card and ATM capabilities.....yes, I was the annoying bitch who held up lines while writing checks......I figure if someone held me at gunpoint and asked me to take them to my ATM to withdraw money....and I said I didn't have one.....they wouldn't believe me and shoot me.

10. Politics for the most part bore me...unless Anderson Cooper is reporting it or some jackass has an affair.......then I get interested (John Edwards.....Creep of the Year!)

11.  I have a couple of guilty pleasures.....I read trashy romance novels while in a bubble bath......I shamelessly watch The Bachelor.....and again......think nothing of buying ridiculously expensive make up.

12.  I love Howard Stern......but want to stab myself for buying so much Sirius Stock...ugh......

13.  I am a good hearted person that would do anything for anybody....however...don't lie to me....that is cause for immediate dismissal from my life.

14.  I have Bachelor degree in Psychology with minors in business and education.....I have a Master's Degree in Shopping

15.  I love to cook and bake.....very good at both.....Love to watch Giada, The Barefoot Contessa and Nigella.....I thrive on entertaining and throwing parties....

16.  I actually like to clean......it is therapeutic.....nothing like a sparkling clean toilet...

17.  I have some really super cool guy friends...I am lucky...my husband is not the jealous type, and lets me indulge in these fun platonic friendships......yes....you can have male friends without sex.

18.  I am very even tempered and have a wicked and sassy sense of humor.....I can laugh at myself.

19.  I live in New Jersey....OK...don't roll your eyes and think boring....no way......Close to NYC...Philadelphia...the beach...the mountains....great tomatoes...beautiful towns to live in.....I know, I know....we do have horrible accents........

20.  I believe that guys that drive big ass trucks or Hummers have little peanut size wieners.

21. In the days of big hair and shoulder pads......I was an NFL Cheerleader...Philadelphia Eagles..I am not sure if I am proud or horrified at that tidbit...yes...I strutted "my stuff" in 4' high heel boots in front of 60,000 crazy fans each Sunday.

22. My kids are embarrassed that I have a "MySpace" page...... Our MySpace Great for networking....why should the kids have all the fun??

23. I love and respect old people (senior citizens)....except for when they drive 5 miles an hour in front of me.....I will keep what I think to myself.....

24. I consider myself a classy and elegant woman......however...... once in a while.....I have to admit I use the F word........

25.  I love meeting new and interesting people from all walks of life.....

26.  I just rescued an adorable 6 year old Bichon Frise named Molly....

27.  My idea of "sensible shoes" is 4" heel, red patent leather sling back with a peep toe.

28.  I am the "East Coast Correspondent" for The Dave Congalton Radio Show......920 KVEC San Luis Obispo, CA 3pm-7pm PST  Listen..He is Fab!!!!!!!

Some Topics I am going to discuss:

Pet Peeves, bikini waxing, shoes, shopping, romance ..crushes...teenage issues.. college admissions...annoying parents (i.e., I am talking parents at dance recitals, sporting events, college tours etc)...starting a business, music, travel, kiss ass co workers....back stabbers... in-laws ...makeup...sex.. weddings...entertaining...cooking....embarrassing moments...all things girlie...and boyish....

I will end my posts with a thought of the day:

When life gives you lemons......you just go ahead and tuck them into your bra.

Pleased to make your acquaintance!

Lisa